Ever lay your head on your pillow at the end of the day and think, "Whew, today was a success! I did everything I wanted to do and did it as well as I hoped. The kids were absolute angels and the house is still clean from last weekend's cleaning."?
No? Okay, phew, I'm not alone!
If you're like me, by the time you get into bed after a long day, you probably think about the things you didn't get done, the things you didn't do as well as you wanted, and you're analyzing your interactions with your kids when they were misbehaving, second-guessing your response and feeling let down. You think, "I'm going to do better tomorrow. Tomorrow is a new day."
But is tomorrow a new day, or is it the same day, just rewritten? The same cycle of stress, overwhelm, chaos, disorganization, and lack of patience is a cycle that won't just magically stop on its own.
You must take specific action to stop this vicious cycle in its tracks. And the sooner the better.
With five simple steps, you can reclaim your self-confidence and feel good about yourself and your life again. No more talking down to yourself about how you're not living up to your potential or that you failed as a mother.
First of all, you need to acknowledge the exact state of your life and give it a mental score. On a scale of 1-10, how closely does your current life match your dream or ideal life?
Ask yourself which areas you are most unhappy with? Is it the lack of help you get from your kids and husband with household chores? Is it the lack of time you have to accomplish the mile long list of things to do? Is it the zero free time you get to just unwind and focus on yourself? Is it that you have completely let go of your own personal goals and ambitions?
Second, now that you pin pointed the exact aspects of life that you're dissatisfied with, come up ideas of how you can change them. For instance, if you're stressed out about all the household tasks that need to be done, consider developing a chore chart where each day it lists 1 or 2 chores each member of the family is responsible for. Keep in mind, your children may not do them as well as you can, but they will gain confidence and responsibility by helping you. My new mantra, "Done is better than perfect."
Third, on your calendar mark out the times where these new behaviors will take place. If it's the example listed above about household chores, have a set time in the daily routine where everyone completes their chores. If the behavior is for you to have time for yourself, plan it out in advance so you can have child care lined up. Whatever the behavior is, make sure to plan it out and stick to the plan.
Next, it's time to reevaluate if your new procedures are indeed helping you feel successful at the end of the day. Was that the answer to your dissatisfaction? If not, go back and reevaluate what your desire life will look and feel like. Maybe you've seen an improvement and you're ready to incorporate a new behavior into the mix. Keep going until you're satisfied.
Lastly, use your imagination to visualize where you can take your life if you put in the effort. I don't think we give ourselves enough credit for what we are capable of. It's time to get rid of self-limiting beliefs and achieve BIG, I mean, REALLY BIG things. Prove it to yourself how amazing you are and I guarantee your kids will notice.
Keep your dreams so big, you have to grow into them! I'll be here cheering you on!
P.S. Download your FREE cheatsheet to keep these steps in the forefront of your mind. Refer to them as often as needed.